Comment Wall

Image result for jars of marijuana

Here's my comment wall for my Trippy Stories!


Comments

  1. Hi Hannah! I like the look of your site! I wasn’t sure what to expect from your title, but now it makes sense. Very funny. I like that you added a little paragraph on the home page! I haven’t seen that from many projects and it was a welcome addition! I was kind of confused as to what verb tense was taking place here. For example, the beginning uses words that indicate the story is happening in present tense, but as it progresses, it switches to past tense. I would just be careful of that going forward. I’m excited to see what urban horror stories you end up telling here! This is such a unique way to approach this topic. It should be interesting! I think that this will be very entertaining to read and I’m definitely looking forward to seeing what all you end up doing with your project!

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  2. Hi Hannah! I hope your semester is going well. Right away, I thought this was a unique and fun approach to your project! Your dialogue is awesome! It felt so familiar and like an interaction I’d have with my roommate. It was super natural. I also adore that you incorporate the Bachelor! Honestly, if you’re going for the most relatable story award, I think you have it squared away. I’m super excited to read more and see where this is going to take us. I wish that either the Home page or the Introduction page had a bit more information regarding what types of folklore or mythology we may encounter later on. I think it would be really beneficial to give the reader a bit of direction right off the bat to keep them engage and driving forward through the reading. I’m also a little bit nervous that these stories could end up super creepy or scary. That’s SO not my thing, but I know it’s an amazing genre! I’m just a baby when it comes to scary things.
    All in all, awesome work so far! I can’t wait to see more!
    Tricia

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  3. Hey Hannah!

    This story was pretty hilarious, even though I knew what I was getting into when I clicked the story. It was still really fun to experience, and I like how your introduction will set up the rest of your Storybook. I'm excited to read the rest of it!

    For starters, I had difficulty finding your comment wall. I clicked everywhere and couldn't find an obvious link. I had to go through a roundabout way in order to leave this comment, so maybe you should look at that! (I might also be seriously blind, but I couldn't find it at all.)

    I like your writing style, it's very easy to read and realistic. The only feedback I have is whenever someone speaks, it's a new paragraph. There is usually no dialogue at the tail end of a paragraph. This just breaks up the text and makes it easier to read. Also, you should describe your characters so we know what they look like, especially since this is third person. Otherwise, good job!

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  4. Hi Hannah!

    What an interesting topic for a project! Marijuana has become a major part of our society, even though it has been prominent for a while. It helps with anxiety, depression, pain, etc. What people never really think about is that this is a "mind altering" substance, so of course you could experience some weird dreams, both while using and while on a hiatus.

    As Dani mentioned before me, I would have a clearer link to your comment wall. Post it right there on the home page, or you could even provide a link to it after every story. Other than that, I think your page layout is great and easy to navigate.

    As for the intro story, I thought it was very well done. It gave great insight into the characters, the setting, and where future stories might be headed. It was very relatable, even though I have no experience smoking. I look forward to seeing your imagination flourish in the future stories. Great job so far!

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  5. Hi Hannah,

    When I read your title for your project, I was not sure what I was about to get myself into. Once I started to read your introduction, I knew I was going to like it. Great job using lots of dialogue in the introduction so that the readers know how the characters feel. It makes the introduction that much more interesting and spices things up in a way. My favorite thing about the path that you chose is how relatable your introduction is. Both of the girls are roommates in college and talking about how stressed out they are because of their classes. The addition of their trippy dreams was a good call.

    As for the layout of your page, I would suggest that you somehow add the link to your comment wall on your home page. I had some trouble finding it to be able to leave you feedback on your project. Also, as I was reading your introduction, I noticed several spots where you need to proofread it and fix some grammar mistakes.

    Overall, I am very excited to follow up with your project and I can't wait to see the final outcome!

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  6. Hi Hannah! I love your storybook so far, I honestly can't wait to read your stories. Your introduction feels so natural and real, I could perfectly picture Stevie and Nicole chatting in their dorm, rolling a joint, getting ready to have the trip of their lives. I have no idea what the stories you will be writing are, whether they are urban legends or based on some of the myths we have read during the semester, but I can only hope they will be as hilarious as your introduction was. I have bookmarked your project and will be checking regularly so that I can read the rest of the project as soon as you finish it! Good luck with the writing, stay safe and take care!

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  7. Hey Hannah,

    I like the introduction of your storybook so far! I think this is a very funny and creative way to do a project, and your writing style flows very well with this type of story. I'm excited to see just how weird these stories get.

    However, I am a bit confused, as I have no idea what kind of myths/urban legends you will be retelling. While I understand that you may want to keep up the suspense, it may be a good idea to put in an author's note of some sort in your introduction that can give at least a little bit of an idea on how your project is going to work.

    That being said, I am very eager to find out who Broccoli Bunch is and what these dreams are about. It sounds like this project is going to be wild and weird, and I can't wait to read more!

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  8. Hello Hannah,

    I would like to start off by you did a really good job with your story. I really thought that your story was funny. I like how your introduction setup the rest of the story. I think your introduction flows really well. The dialogue in the story is so good that I am able to visualize exactly what is going on. I have one question what made you want to write about marijuana. But whatever made write about it was a good idea because I have yet to come across a story like this. I can not wait to read your other stories. It is going to be interesting on what kind of myths/urban legends you are gonna be telling about because most of them have nothing to do with marijuana. Overall I think you did a really good job and can not wait to read about what you write in the future.

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